Monday, January 25, 2010

Here we are again....

So here I am again, in a place I have found myself many, many times in the past, and will probably find myself many times in the future as well. I'm sitting in front of my desk, in front of a keyboard, thinking that there has to be more than life than just going through the daily grind of going to work, going home, eating, sleeping, rinse, lather, repeat.

I guess I have painted myself into a corner. Frankly I don't really see myself doing anything different, because it's just so...there is really is nothing different for me to do, and it has been like that for as long as I can remember.

Oh, I know what you're thinking...assuming someone other than myself is reading this, which I doubt. You would say that there is a world of opportunities out there, things to do, places to go, so on and so forth, and you're right. But somehow, for me at least, varying my routine invariably leads me back to my invariable lifestyle...did you get that? Whatever I try to do, somehow I almost always end up to where I started from. This has its advantages sometimes, since I almost always know what will happen in the future...which most of the time...is practically nothing.

One man's gift of prophecy is another man's curse of cynicism.

Maybe you'd say that I haven't been trying hard enough, and you'd probably be right. Maybe I've stayed too long in my comfort zones and unwilling, or unable, to do anything to change that. I admit it. I'm a creature of habit, and leaving my comfort zones is not something that I find easy to do.

But I guess I have to if I want to break out of the cycle. Life has become so utterly boring that I have already straddled the line between living and merely existing...and that's definitely not a good place to be.

So it's settled then. I'll strive to do new things...take up new pastimes, meet new people, establish new relationships, go places I've never been before. To be willing to try something new for a change.

Life is too short to be stuck doing the same things over and over.

Who wants to just exist?





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