The thing I miss....

You know what I miss about being in a relationship? Quick, take a guess. It's actually not what you think. If you think about it, except for the "loving and being loved" part (which I also miss, but that's not the subject of this post), virtually anything you can do in a relationship you can also do outside of one. Companionship? You can have friends for that. Maybe even a pet. Going out on movies and dates? Ditto...except for the pets of course. :-) Having someone to talk to? Likewise. Including pets. You can also talk to plants (it helps them grow) or to yourself (if you are so inclined). Sex? Friends...even acquaintances can also help you with that, and in dire situations you can even pay for it (not that I'm implying that I do that myself, mind you. I'm just saying that you can).

So what is it that I'm referring to? Give up? Okay, I'll let you in my secret. The thing I miss a lot about being in a relationship is...(drum roll please) dancing. Before you raise your eyebrows, here me out first. I don't mean the rapid, pulse-pounding kind of dancing you do in music bars, moving yourself to the beat of RnB, rap, rave, house or trance music blaring out of massive sub-woofers that you can actually feel your internal organs vibrate. And I also don't mean ballroom dancing with all it's intricate steps, impersonalized and commercialized by the proliferation of DIs (dance instructors) which on occassion have been known to provide extra services. I mean slow, relaxed, dancing where a the couple are in each other's arms.

So what's so special about this kind of dancing? Both of you move lazily to some slow, romantic tune, bask in each other's loving gaze and hold each other close. You don't even have to say anything, you just let yourself go, let your feelings and emotions take over and let things happen naturally. This is the type of thing that you can't do with just anyone. You have to have some level of emotional attachment to the person to dance this intimately with. I guess you might even say that this is more intimate than sex, because you aren't just baring your body. You're baring your soul, and this is something you just can't fake no matter how hard you try. It's hard to stare into someone's eyes and not give away what you feel.

I imagine doing this to the tune of some old slow standard song, maybe something by Frank Sinatra, like "All The Way," perhaps Linda Ronstadt's "I've Got A Crush On You," a guitar instrumental, like Joe Satriani's "Sleepwalk," or something more or less current, like Norah Jones' "Don't Know Why." I'm not really sure myself what makes a song suitable for this type of dancing. I would suppose, above anything else, it has to be slow, and romantic.

It doesn't really matter where you do this. I imagine there are hardly a lot of public places which cater to this kind of dancing anymore, and besides, there isn't much privacy. In fact in my mind I picture it being done at home, with dim lights, perhaps a bottle of fine wine, music playing softly in the background. A fireplace would be nice, thought I sincerely doubt it if we would actually need one, given how hot it can be here nowadays.

It's been years since I last did this. Five or so, if I'm not mistaken. Yeah, this is what I miss. I absolutely have no idea when I can do this again, but I hope I can do it again sometime in the future with someone I care about. That's just the sentimental, hopeless romantic in me speaking I guess.

I won't admit to being one, of course. :-)