For someone out there....

This is for a girl who's actually very special to me. Unfortunately, either she doesn't realize it, or she's so busy worrying about her work, her business, and just about everything else...except the things that matter...herself, her happiness, and her life.

I've known her for more than a year now, almost two years now actually, and I doubt it if she still rememembers. She's very intelligent, kind, educated, well read, religious, refined, driven, and very pretty I may add. She has a business of her own, a loving family, friends, in perfect health, and yet...I've hardly ever talked to her in almost those two years without her complaining about something.

In almost two years.

She complains about work, her responsibilities, her frustrations, her family, about lost opportunities, about managing finances, about unfulfilled dreams, about the things in life that we cannot change.

I can relate. I'm a cynic as well. I also tend to be a realist, and I always assume the worst. But there are times that we need to recognize the blessings that we have...and make the most of them. Sometimes we have to cut our losses, and there's no shame in that. We can't all be winners. Even if we are, we cannot win all the time. If we do, then where's the thrill in that? I for one am not a winner, and I have lost a lot in my years. But I would like to believe that it's our attitude, the way that we carry ourselves in times of adversity that define the person that we are. That, in my humble opinion, is what makes someone a winner. What doesn't kill us...only makes us stronger.

I wish my friend would understand this. I have listened intently to her rants...often I have even empathized. But if a person is unhappy with everything that comes into his or her life...even the good stuff...there has to be something amiss. Setbacks happen. It's a fact of life that we have to learn to accept and deal with from time to time. It's no reason to give up and be miserable.

Unfortunately, she can be stubborn as mule, and she insists on doing things her own way...:-) And invariably...she complains about more or less the same things.

I am not a wise man, I'm not even that smart. For all I know any advice I give can be as worthless as a discarded cigarette butt. But I just want her to know, to realize, that life is gift given by God and is meant to be lived. Life is too short to waste on being sad, miserable, disappointed, or frustrated. God knows we have too much of that already...no sense dwelling on it. They say that the best things in life are free, and that's so true. All the blessings that each and everyone of us have right now is not worth all the money in the world. Perhaps you disagree. Let me prove it.

If you're reading this right now, no doubt you have eyes to see with. How much are you willing to sell your eyesight for? A million? Two million? See what I mean. :-) Your good health, would you sell it? You may hate your work, your business, but ask the next unemployed bloke you see on the street how much a source of income is worth to him. Would you sell an arm? A leg? Even a finger? You see my point?

If there are a lot of things that make one feel bad in this world, but there are also a lot of things that can make one feel good. To everything there is a balance. A half empty glass is a half full glass too. What matters is just how we see things.

We should not take the simple things for granted. The family and friends that love us and care for us. Our health. Our safety. Our dreams. The myriad opportunities that the world has to offer. And yet...sometimes we choose to forsake these things to pursue other objectives. Objectives like wealth...success...careers. These come in their own time, and they cannot be rushed. If we force the issue...there is often a price to be paid. We may have to give up some things that we may regret later on. And life is also too short for regrets.

True happiness comes from within. Our happiness cannot depend on other people, on things that may or may not happen. It doesn't matter what we do, where we are, where we go, who we're with, even how much we earn or the things we have. If we don't find a reason within ourselves to be happy, chances are we never will. And that's no way to live a life.

I don't know if you would be able to read this, or even if you do, if this would actually help. Needless to say, I am here for you if you need a friend. And even if you don't. We might not get to see each other that often or talk much anymore, but that's not the essence of true friendship anyway, is it not? I'll also say a prayer for you from time to time, and I sincerely hope that things will be better for you. Remember, things are never as bad as we think them to be.

Keep the faith. :-)